The same question that's been asked for years: is MTV at all relevant? If tonight's VMAs were any indication then the answer would be a seriously loud no. First, could Britney's "come back" performance to open the show be any more dead? She looked like she was a second-rate stripper at a dress rehearsal and the lip syncing? Come on already. Sing dammit. Second, Gym Class Heroes, best new artist? Singing a Supertramp cover? Who the fuck are they anyway? Third, yes Chris Brown is talented, but again, sing, bitch. Come on -- what is wrong here? Justin had a great time, because he was drunk. Alicia Keys' new song was hot. Rihanna? Use your talent to record something memorable. Someone needs to produce an awards show for music that really matters and not shit that just sells records and premieres in the Billboard Top 10. Thank god for Tivo because if I had to honestly sit through two hours of that crap, I'd be pissed.